Do you remember the old TV show ‘Make Me Laugh”? One
contestant’s job was to tell jokes or do something funny in an effort to make a
panel, whose job it was to not laugh, laugh. Lately I suspect the evening news
programs have taken over where “Make Me Laugh” left off. I try to take the news
seriously but sometimes it’s just too hard. I have to laugh.
A recent national a news program was a great example. We had
the report on the “Sequester”. Every few months it’s some clever new title for
the latest looming disaster. Before the Sequester it was the “Fiscal Cliff.” I’m
not sure who dreams up these catchy titles but I’m sure it’s someone’s job. Just
yesterday, I overheard a couple of older women talking about their grave
concerns about the latest looming disaster. One said she did not know what was
going to happen to this country if we went over the Fiscal Cliff. I was tempted
to tell her she was on the wrong looming disaster by a few months. But then I
decided she was smarter than I. Obviously she had stopped watching the evening
news.
So about the crisis d’jour: Sequester. Despite the grave
fears, Congress went home and refused to do anything about the automatic and drastic
cuts to virtually all segments of the federal budget until “Obama comes to his
senses”. Doesn’t matter that Obama won the most recent election with a rather
tidy margin. And that he’s made offers of 2 to 1 budget cuts to revenue
increases. Or that all the polls show most voters want our elected officials to
act like grown-ups, get along and solve problems. Not take their ball and go
home like our Congress did. If you can’t find a laugh in the dysfunctional
government that led to the Sequester what good is our system of government
anyway?
Then there was some story about criticism for a member of
the Kennedy clan, a son of Bobby, and how he has the unmitigated gall to say something
nice about Cesar Chavez, the President of Venezuela. OK, we all know Chavez has
been on America
But this Kennedy fellow, a good- looking silver-haired man
who used to work in the U S Congress and now works with a coalition to help the poor in this country get heating oil, said Chavez
did a good thing. Seems, CITGO and Chavez were the only ones who gave assistance
to Americans who can’t afford heating oil. That is unless the poor folks stop
buying groceries. Well, a half billion dollars in aid to the poor in this country
who can’t afford heating oil may be a bit of an embarrassment. But so are old
people starving or freezing in their homes. Laughing yet?
I suppose this Sequester is not going to help the old people who have been struggling to pay
for their heating oil. Good thing our Congress is stepping up to do something
about that. But no, I forgot, they all went home for a much needed break. LOL
The next item of news was a sink hole that swallowed a man and
his bedroom while the swallowed man’s brother tried to save him. Sounds like
something from one of those horror movies. Was that “Poltergeist” where people
were sucked out of their homes? Like in most horror movies, the national news
included an interview with the swallowed man’s relatives. There was no mention
of any efforts to bring in equipment or do anything to see if they could save
him. I guess he was taken to another dimension and the whole rescue thing was
pointless. Or maybe with the Sequester we just don’t have rescue funds any
more. But really—if they can rescue coal miners who have been trapped for
weeks, why can’t we even talk about whether rescue is feasible? Still not
laughing?
Then there was the all-consuming story about the retiring
Pope ascending in his helicopter--to be taken to his castle, a temporary
retreat until his new abode is built. We were reminded a Pope has not retired
in hundreds of years. And the last leader of the Church to ascend was Jesus.
When there were no helicopters, at least as far as we know. The world waits
with bated breath for the process of selecting the Pope’s successor.
I may be the only
one, but as a fallen-away Catholic, I am not bating my breath waiting for a new
Pope to be selected. In fact, I’m wishing some of the other really old and
out-of-touch decision-makers in this world would consider retiring. But I am
laughing at the image of the retiring Pope ascending in a helicopter.
Which brings me to the next news item. The Supreme Court
heard arguments on the Voting Rights Act. Apparently they are considering
whether the Voting Rights Act is now an unnecessary “racial entitlement”. Rather than talking about voting as a racial entitlement
I’d expect the most conservative members of the Court, who support judicial
restraint and deference to the legislature, would be considering that Congress
overwhelmingly renewed the Voting Rights Act—the Senate voted to renew 98 to
zip. I’d like to know how the Senate
agreed on anything with that degree of unanimity. And now the Court may
overturn it. A little chuckle here for our dysfunctional government.
But now for a belly laugh. The national news ran a clip of
Obama saying he could not use a “Jedi Mind Meld” on the Republicans to get them
to see the error of their ways on Sequester. Obama got a nerdy sci-fi reference
wrong. ROFL!!LOL!!!
As we all know, or anyone who raised a son, has a geeky
husband or friend, or is themselves a sci-fi nerd, Jedi’s don’t use mind melds.
That’s Vulcans in Star Trek. So not only do the Republicans criticize
everything Obama says and does. But now he has the whole galaxy of sci-fi nerds
outraged. I have three words for you nerds: “Get over it.”
Obama was not reciting a movie quote he was riffing on sci-fi
themes and creatively melding two concepts to create an analogy to fit the
situation.
But as we all know, what Obama really needs are some Jedi
mind games if he hopes to get the Republicans to do what is right for this
country, given that they are immune to rational appeals. Now that is a movie I’d
happily go see.
Instead of laughing at the national news’ rendition of “Make
Me Laugh” with their recounting of actual events, I’ve gotten so I prefer Jeff
Daniels as a fake news anchor in “The Newsroom”. At least when I laugh at that
program, the laughs are intended.
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